Dear Emo/Scene Kids:

This is a letter to all of you out there, and I know there are many. This is not going to be respectful, or kind, because I really don't like you. Ahh, yes, I know. Another person who, "Just doesn't understand you," right?

Though I must say, you make me laugh. You bash conformity, and say how everyone--except you, of course-- is just part of the capitalist machine of the United States. But what's really funny is that you have not a shred of originality in your scrawny little, I'm-a-vegetarian-so-I'm-better-than-you body. Your hair is black, probably. Side bangs perennially over one eye, am I correct? All you guys wear black nail polish and eye liner to set yourself apart, to show how "different" you are. All you girls: it might be very long and straight, with some odd sort of gunshot wound resemblance at the top of your head. Whoa, you are so cool. Your hair is the sex. I believe that is what you call it. The sex? We are not worthy. I bet I can describe 99% of your wardrobe in a few simple words: a lot of jeans. You guys wear girls' jeans as a big middle finger to "conventional fashion." Yes, you really are protesting our grossly commercial society, buying those jeans at American Eagle. I applaud you. Hoodies. Now, we all have hoodies, but you're emo, so yours is probably from Hot Topic. Band tees. Again, many people have band tees. Just not all have 3 Hawthorne Heights, 2 Hellogoodbye, and 3 someothershittyband.

Ah, yes, music. The root of all that is emo. You worship screamo frontman with whiny voices. I bet you would love to meet Craig Owens, wouldn't you? His lyrics are, like, so deep. Did Craig Owens look deep into your soul and transfer into song? Incredible. Wow. Wow. All of you like the same bands. Everyone's going to think I'm a fierce hypocrite, and perhaps I am...but you think that you listen to the best music on earth. Period. You condemn the music taste of those who would rather listen to a gentle plucking of an acoustic guitar and a quirky voice than the gutteral screeches of Mr. Screamoman. Music is your life, isn't it? That's what it says in your "About Me", at least. You also list every single band you might've liked one song from in your music section, just to show how "awesome" your music taste is. Some really emo kids even list bands they HAVEN'T listened to, but their friends tell them are "like, sweet." Those bands "pwn", dare I say. YOU. LOVE. MUSIC. Nothing like ear-pounding guitars and riotous drums to really bring out the real meaning of music: expression of emotion. The Beatles bore you, and who's Bob Dylan? Oh, right. That old guy your parents listen to. Whatever, he's so totally lame. You refuse to listen to music outside of your scene. I bet that if I played you some classical, perhaps a little Gershwin or Bach, you would roll your eyes and say that "that classical shit" is so boring. God forbid you should appreciate the incredible, incredible beauty of pure instrumentation.

You have more myspace friends then real friends. Your screen name is probably something like XxibleedforyouxX, or perhaps XxbrokenxheartsxparadeXX. Myspace name? Hello Amy Apocalypse, have you met Tiffany [TERROR]? I'm sure you'll get along just swimmingly.

All the girls want to "bang" Taking Back Sunday's Adam Lazzarra, while all you guys came alive the day you first heard Hayley Williams (of Paramore)'s voice. Don't get me wrong, I like Paramore, though I know they are kind of unoriginal. I sort of file them under "Guilty Pleasures". And Hayley Williams' voice IS pretty fierce. But I digress.

You bash Bush without a thought. Now, I also really DO NOT LIKE HIM. AT ALL. I count down the days until he is out of office. But name one specific thing that he did to screw up. Oh, you can't? Exactly. You know nothing about the politics you bash. You just bash Bush because it's the cool thing to do, right? You're so rebellious. Shall I bow?

I leave you with a quote from yourscenesucks:
"wouldn't it be more of an act of rebellion if you didn't spend so much time buying blue hair dye and going out to get punky clothes? it seems so petty. stop me if I'm being offensive. you wanna be an individual, right? you look like you're wearing a uniform. you look like a punk. that's not rebellion. that's fashion."

Look at yourself. YOU ARE JUST LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE.

I'll leave you to your poetry filled with mundane words and thoughts.
Stay golden!
anna






Now, dear readers:
I am not normally a spiteful person. I can respect people's differences, different music tastes, whatever. But I just can not stand emo kids. I was so sick of their condescending looks and attitudes toward those who do not fit their perfectly shaped mold. I just really, really, hate emo and scene kids. They make me want to scream and stomp and flush their hair dye down the drain. Am I the only one?


On an entirely different topic. I want to see Juno with a desire bordering on desperation. The soundtrack is totally kick-ass, and the movie looks refreshing. Considering I live in farm country, we are not getting the movie in our local theaters until this Friday.






Here, read some ee cummings

love is a place
& through this place
of love move
(with brightness of peace)all places

yes is a world
& in this world of
yes live
(skilfully curled)
all worlds




oooga booga boo!
a